5 Things to Leave in 2020 In Pursuit of Your Best Year

What a year! We came, we saw, we survived. As we turn the page to 2021, I want to share a list of things to leave in 2020 in pursuit of your best year!

1. Mom Guilt

This year showed us just how much we aren't in control of anything, especially as it relates to the education system. All the mom judgment went out of the window as soon as online learning started. All of a sudden screen time restrictions became non-existent and people began to navigate what was best for their OWN kids, and guess what... the world is still spinning. Let's channel more of this in the new year as the vaccine rolls out, people get their stimulus checks (hopefully), and people make plans for their time. You are only responsible for and in charge of your own life, let's leave the #momguilt in the trash.

2. Energy Vampires

Have you ever had a "friend" who drains the literal life out of you every single time you talk? It seems like nothing is ever going right in their life ever, and they always see the glass as half empty even when you point out the positive. I refer to these people as #energyvampires and they somehow always seem to find you when your own life is on the climb. In the new year I want to encourage you to stand next to people who feel like sunshine. People who not only want to hear your successes but celebrate with you. People who listen to you as much and as intently as you listen to them. Like any other year there will be ups and downs and true friends will stick with you along that course, but pay attention to how the people around you make you feel. If you feel exhausted after talking to the same person every time it may be time to let the shades up, let your light shine, and rid yourself of the energy vampire once and for all.

"If you feel exhausted after talking to the same person every time it may be time to let the shades up, let your light shine, and rid yourself of the energy vampire once and for all."

3. Playing Small

Are there people, places, or situations in your life where you feel like you have to diminish the fact that you are doing really well at something? This could sound like not bringing up the fact that you got a new car/home/(fill-in-the-blank) to a certain friend or relative because of fear of what they will think about it or because they haven't gotten the things they are in pursuit of. This could look like you wearing baggier clothes after you've lost the weight you were working to lose around a certain friend because you don't want to make them feel bad that they haven't accomplished what they set out to. Fill in the blank with your own situation, are there places in your life where you intentionally dull your shine to help others feel better about what they have or haven't done? STOP. If 2020 has taught us nothing else it has shown us that life is incredibly precious and every single accomplishment deserves to be celebrated and savored. There are no brownie points in the present or the future for playing small. The funny thing is the same people you are playing small for would wave their new car/house keys in your face and do a victory lap. If they lost the weight they would buy every bodycon dress they could find. LIVE YOUR LIFE!!

4. Imposter Syndrome

If you aren't familiar with imposter syndrome, it is consistently doubting your own skills, talent, and self in situations. The feeling that you've somehow succeeded out of luck and not by your own hard work and talents. As the new year begins I encourage you to apply for that job that you think you have to have an Ivy League degree to get, to audition for that role that "they" say you aren't experienced enough for, to write that book that is living in your head. I can assure you there is somebody with less experience than you, less education than you, and less passion than you, doing what you are dreaming of just because they jumped out there and did it. You can do it too - take daily steps to say adios to imposter syndrome by stepping out on the ledge of doing things that aren't in your comfort zone. You will undoubtedly find new niches and happy places that build your inner confidence up enough to recognize imposter syndrome when it tries to show it's raggedy face.

5. Overworking

This is not to be confused with "working". If you have a job that you are paid to do it is your responsibility to do it and do it well. However, stretching yourself incredibly thin working insane hours for a pat on the back is a recipe for self-implosion. COVID-19 has put on full display the fragility of human life. As we've seen with the deaths of so many greats this year young and old: Kobe Bryant (41) , Chadwick Boseman (43), and Alex Trebek (80) to name a few, we are only here for a finite amount of time. Take the time to do a mental audit from time to time to check how you are spending your time against the things that matter most to you. Remember, people will mourn you for a time, if they really liked you they may even name something after you, but they will no doubt replace you. As the saying goes "the show must go on".

As we head into the New Year just remember to leave "MEPIO" behind. That's an acronym I just created with the first letter of all of the things listed above. Lame? Maybe. But I'm stepping out of my comfort zone starting this blog to help others, what are you doing to change the tide in your life?

Happy New Year!

Tiffany